I appreciate everything that you are trying to do and say. But, I need you to just stop. You might wonder what is the best way to support me? That is a huge, loaded question that I might not always be able to answer. Okay, maybe more like, I am NEVER able to answer it. I can tell you what I don't need you to do. These are hard fast things too. If you stop and think it might just be the way you don't want to be treated. I might not even blink if you do one of these. I am a VERY forgiving person and feel bad if my feelings are hurt. However I am reaching my breaking point. I might jump and give a sarcastic response back... then feel bad later... even if you were out of line.
Here is my little bit of advice if you want to support your friend. These are things to NEVER do.
1. Don't judge me.
I am doing the best that I can for what I have on my plate. If you think that you know everything that is going on with me, you don't. I may seem like an open book; I'm not. There is a lot that I never tell anyone. You may think that you have come up with some new way of eating that is THE only way... I can almost promise that I have already tried it. So, don't judge me, I'm not judging you.
2. Don't push your church or beliefs.
I have a priest. I go to my own church. It makes me feel like you think that I am not a REAL Christian. Guess what you aren't Jesus. If I was wanting to go to your service, bible study, church anything, I would ask. I will never ask you to come to my church instead of yours. That would be rude. Instead of bringing me closer to God you are hurting me.
This is a biggy, so, commit this to memory!
3. Don't offer medical treatment options unless you are asked.
I have done the gluten free, grain free, whatever- you- can- suggest. No a chiropractor can't fix it. It doesn't matter if it is my son or me. If you have suggested it so have others. I believe in God and don't feel that I need science to confirm it. HOWEVER, when it comes to everything else I rely on science.
4. Don't try to change my mind.
Please see above...SCIENCE
5. Don't bring up anything that is serious.
Incase you haven't been reading my stuff lately... I am up over my head with serious. I think, breath, eat, drink and dream about serious stuff. I want to only discuss silly, funny stuff. Coffee and chocolate are appropriate topics too.
6. Don't want to get together with me unless you want to hear me spill my guts.
If I am having a day where I need to talk, it might come on without warning, Then be prepared to listen. Don't try to fix it because you can't. Just listen and give hugs.
If you have been brave enough to make it thru this letter you might realize that you and I are much more a like than you realizes. I hope that if I happen to do one of the above, feel free to whack me on the head.